The "Forgiveness Factor Fallout"- I've been thinking about this a lot lately. It's the time, often in elementary school around 4th grade, when high masking neurocomplex kids start to experience their peers' distancing themselves socially. I talk to parents a lot and this experience is heartbreakingly common.
Kids who once got invited to birthday parties and playdates find themselves without a peer group. It can be very isolating and lonely and it's definitely confusing! Once accepted quirks and idiosyncrasies may now be interpreted as unexpected or unsettling to peers. The invisible disabilities of our twice exceptional/high masking kids suddenly become perceptible...and often mental health concerns follow (i.e. Autistic burnout).
In my opinion, it's why finding other neurocomplex peers (and neurodivergent families) is such an important protective factor for our kids. Being with other kids who have a similar lived experience can be so supportive when you feel like you're the only one going through something. Knowing you are not broken and there are other people in the world like you is so validating. And it's one of the best parts of being a social coach; facilitating this magic of finding belonging amongst the quirkiest of kids.
My hope for you and your child is that you find neurokindred community and you hold tight to being who you are.
Sending love,
Breann
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